Saturday, July 26, 2008

Three score and ten

It's important to understand what someone means and not be misled over a word. This is the same sort of thing I was getting at in the last post. A cynic or a suspicious mind can mistake what is meant when someone says the 'like' children. It need not have any bad undertones - you can simply be glad that children, and teenagers, and young adults exist because you appreciate them for what they are. I badly wanted to have a daughter. So it was pure joy when Liz (my wife) and I had a baby girl. Now if someone said I was glad because 'I like little girls' that could be misunderstood quite badly. In fact, you can just appreciate little girls, or any young children, simply because they are truly amazing. They are new life, and a renewal of humanity. When a baby is born, their eyes can look clear and bright because they are all new, there's been no wear and tear. None of this means older people are any LESS valuable. I could write just as much about the value of greater age and experience. For me it's easier to have a deep conversation with someone my own age, because we've got more in common. The best friends I have are of my age group. But I won't be one of those people who trash on 'the young' all the time. Then again this is not meant to condescend, either. I hate condescension. But just now, this post is written in appreciation of youth - starting with, but not only about, my own kids.
One time I gave my oldest son and his friends a lift down to the movies, and just watched them all crossing the street; and I really liked just watching all of them and thinking, it's good that they exist. Like any parent, I'm proud of my kids and it gives me a buzz just seeing them. It's good that they've come into the world. The same goes for all of our kids. My daughter too; I see her with some of her friends, and it's a good feeling to know that those girls were born and came into the world. It's got nothing to do with being attracted to them in a sexual way at all.
And feeling that way, I can appreciate other peoples' children as well, not by sticking my nose into their lives but just understanding why other parents are glad of their kids.
You can get the same feeling reading peoples' blogs. Younger ones, they can show a lot of enthusiasm and imagination, and it can keep you interested for hours.
Sometimes young children, or teenagers, can show a resemblance to older family members. It can be a warming reminder that life goes on. Obviously, unless you believe in reincarnation (which I do NOT) then finding that a young girl resembles her beloved and now deceased great grandmother is not the same as actually having that person back. But it can show that what is good in a person does not have to be entirely lost when they pass on.
It can be silly to idealize something right over the top. Pity someone who can't cope with being over 40 and they have to go on with the denial stuff; stacks of money spent on cosmetic surgery and being Ole' Fifty five trying to act twenty five. Getting older usually means you can sort certain things out and not agonize so much over what to do. Things get more decided. It's possible to be quite content when you're over 40. But any age has its good and bad side. Someone once said they wished all people could be born 26 years of age. Mistake! Childhood and youth are part of getting a complete life. What can really upset you is seeing what could be so good, wasted and spoiled. I hate seeing what some narcotics can do to people - such as reduce them to depression and self-destruction! Bad, bad, heartbreaking! But it isn't always that bad. So let's hope we can all get our three score and ten - 70 years.


Mella said...

Although that interpretation of the quote has passed through my mind briefly before, reading your thoughts on the subject does bring something new to light.

Especially your thoughts on rejection and love. I have never thought of 'people who are into self-rejection
tend to reject others' but thinking about it, I couldn't agree more.

Thank you for your insight. =D

Culpster said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Taylor-Tot said...

i agree, theres good and bad 2 every age. and i'm glad YOU can see that. not everybody does.-Taylor Tot

Marshall Art said...

"Everybody I know that is my age (27) is freaking out about turning 30."

Wait until you get to experience hearing a statement like that when your fifty-three. Quite a different perspective. You wonder if you truly remember what it was like turning thirty. Then you're not sure if you were even paying attention. All you know for sure is, "How did I get here?" Makes me wish I'd kept a journal or took more pictures.


Your comments regarding dropping your kid off at the show brought to mind my thrill at seeing my daughter at school or at play when she didn't know I was watching. I always hoped for the opportunity to watch them in their element (praying, of course, that I never see something I wouldn't like), being themselves with their own peers. It's just so cool. Even with my wife's daughters, who are now in their late twenties, I enjoy watching them from across the room, seeing them interact (I've been around them since they were 1 & 3 yrs old.). It's truly something special.

PTChick said...

I went online and read the excerpts from the book and I grabbed my attention. Now I just have to hope that the library gets the book so that I can read it. Fantasy is my passion, reading it or writing it.

Krosemarie said...

I like this post a lot.....and thank you for the comment and book reccomendation on my blog, it sounds very interesting!!! -Krosemarie

Gypsy at Heart said...

Andrew, I'm hoping I'll get more than that because by that age my little boy will be in his 30's and considering how late people marry in life nowadays (yours truly included) and have children (again me), I won't have much of an opportunity to enjoy my grandchildren (praying and hoping I get to see them) before I have to go off. Anyway, I agree with you completely about the importance of choosing the correct words and I also realize that even then, the correct word can be soooo misunderstood. And children are a marvel. I'm glad to the 10th degree that my own little one came into this world. It was a happy one before his arrival but now I know what glory is. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I'm intrigued by the premise of your book so I will read the excerpt. From one book lover to another, you have a wonderful day and I will stop by again.


Taylor-Tot said...


Farrah said...

If I make Jesus the center of my affection, age is nothing to fear and death is something to look forward to. Someday I'll close my eyes for the last time, and when I open them, Jesus will be there to greet me. It is a sweet transition to be anticipated.

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