Friday, May 1, 2009

It doesn't have to be this way.

It's not good to be judgemental. I could find myself pointing the finger at others and forgetting my own shortcomings. But it's impossible not to be disappointed at some of the things you see.
Why did Mel Gibson have to go and do what he did?
It's his life, I can't live it. He doesn't answer to me. But if we have concepts of good and bad, right and wrong, we can't help thinking BAD IDEA sometimes.
Mel Gibson had been married to the same lady for thirty years. That is a real contrast to some prominent entertainers who seem to change relationships like they change fashion clothes. Also, Mr Gibson had stayed with the wife of his youth, the lady who was there for him before he was famous. Some people don't. When they start 'moving up' in life, they obtain a bigger better house, a bigger flashier car and a more ostentatious partner, to go with their new image. As a Christian, I found it inspiring to see this person avoiding all that. They had seven children - showing faith and hope in life, not giving way to the cynicism which goes with avoiding children because you fear for the future. And there was "The Passion Of The Christ". It was harrowing to watch, but it looked to me like a magnificent representation of the suffering and sacrifice of Jesus. It was said people actually became saved because the film made that much impression on them. So this seems like a human used of God to evangelise, share the Word and use his art to the glory of God instead of just his own vanity or profit.
There were problems. There was the time Mel was stopped for drunk driving and had a huge vent about Jewish people. NOT the right approach for a Christian. But we all have bad moments.
The latest thing is just tinny. Walking out of his marriage for a younger woman. Originality factor 0 our of 1000.
I don't judge this man. It just disappoints when someone who showed the world what a difference Christ could make, let it fall.
I'm in some position to comment. My marriage broke up - and we got it back together again. That was now 24 years ago. The relationship blew up and humanly speaking, we'd both had enough. There was no third party involved, except the evil one. Pressures beyond our control combined perniciously with our human shortcomings to wreck the relationship. What God led us to do is shown by Proverbs 3 vs 5-6:
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
If the two of us had followed our feelings, we would have called it off. But we both felt we should do what the Lord's Word said. We did. And it worked. The credit belongs to God, not us. The point here is, a spiteful win for evil was taken from it and turned into a victory for God. Of our five children, three were born after we were brought back together. It's as if evil wanted to stop them coming into the world! This year the relationship has lasted 29 years. God grant it lasts all our lives. Now THAT is what God can do.
I can't make it my place to rebuke Mel Gibson. All I can say it, it need not have been that way. He apparently asked some bishops to pray for him. So he knows God is part of the equation. And it need not have ended the way it did. God invented marriage. He said we become one flesh. And what God has joined, no human should take apart. We become one flesh. That literally DOES happen when children are born. They literally do combine the physical identity of both parents, in one.
Tell me if you think I'm wrong. Tell me if you agree. I need the counsell and fellowship other Christians, be they male or female, young or old, whatever their race. We are all made in the image of God and He gave His Word to us all. We CAN avoid lapsing into the weak behaviour of the world. It may not be easy, but ALL things are possible with God.
The maker of a brilliant Christian film might have attracted the rage of satan. But he need not be beaten by it.


Tamela's Place said...

I totally agree, It need not to be that way, he could of hung on with the strength and power of God in his life to save his marriage. But i think his eyes have gotten off of the Lord and onto this world and himself. Sadly it seems as if the enemy has had the victory in this. But we can pray and hopefully Mel's heart and eyes will be opened and he will begin to walk the path that God has called for him, before the enemy has total victory in his life.

Fr. Peter Doodes said...

You are correct and I agree with you. I am at present writing a sermon for a wedding, and the hinge words that were given to me (don't think that I am capable of this) was

"And it is upon the cornerstone of that relationship... marriage... that the foundations of your relationship together, the future of two families and the future of our society are to be built".

The evil one seeks out those in prominent positions and those that he know will be in prominent position that he can destroy.

With Mel he may have won, time will tell, with you he lost, wonderful, and he will lose at the end of time, comforting thought that, but NOT for him!

JMMEE said...

Well written. Wisely stated.
I could not agree with you more.
Praise our Lord that He lead you and your wife down the road of what is right in regards to your own marriage.
Your testimony of the difficulties and hardships overcome by the grace of God is a beacon in this fallen world that treats marriage as disposable on a whim.
God bless you for your out-spoken stand for the truth.

Stella said...

You can be sure that God won't write him off so easily as you have!
Yes, I agree that it is such a shame that this has happened especially as his domestic situation was such a rare thing in the environment he lives in.
When your marriage faltered it wasn't the end of the story for you. With God's help, you were able to rebuild your lives and I'm sure that you learnt so much from that experience and became a much better person because of it.
I have been married for 35 years, and there have been rocky times, but we hung in there and have come through. I know that I have learnt so much from the experience and I hope that I am a much better person. I also know that I am now in a position to appreciate how blessed I am in my life.
Many lessons can be learned only by making mistakes. Maybe this will be the case for Mel.
Life on this earth is a continuing journey and is not over until we draw our last breath. The same applies to our faith journey.
Journeys involve wrong turnings and cul-de-sacs. But we walk with God. He will stick with us, come what may.

Andrew Clarke said...

Stella, I agree with what you say except for one thing: I haven't written this person off. God does not stop reaching out to people unless they utterly turn their back on Him, I know. And I should not judge. But would you agree that while you do not write a person off, you may still remonstrate with what they have done. In fact, if you care at all you take the trouble to comment on what they do. I agree, we learn from trials. It is important not to give way to things though, much as you feel like it at times.

Stella said...

Andrew, of course we should not condone this sort of thing but being human, we sometimes fall short. All of us. But it is a case of hate the sin and love the sinner, and if we are concious of our own shortcomings, then maybe this should make us concentrate even more on loving the sinner.
I don't believe God ever gives up on anyone, no matter how many times we turn our back on him.
We all turn our back on him. Even those who claim to "be saved".
In God's hands even our sin can be turned round and we can become better Christians because of it.
I realise that my views may not be in step with other contributors, but you were asking for a range of opinions.
God bless

Andrew Clarke said...

That's quite true, Stella. I'm glad to hear your view on the issue. In fact I'll be glad to hear your comments on any post as you wish. And as you say, God does not abandon people, he invites them to return to Him even when they've well and truly 'blown it'. That is shown by the parable of the Prodigal son. God bless.

Farrah said...

I agree that it didn't have to be that way. We are living during a time when divorce is quite common in some countries. It wasn't always so. People used to believe in commitment and faithfulness. Now, even husbands and wives who stay together have affairs and see nothing amiss with lusting after others and flirting. It is possible to be completely faithful with the help of God. I know, because I was a real flirt before getting married, and I learned to completely supress that to the point that my husband is the only one I look at or think about. We celebrated 10 years our last anniversary. I love being married to this man! Praise God!

Jenny B. said...

I have seen it time and again- those who show the world who God really is seem to have a target on them that the enemy aims for. It happened with Todd Bentley (who, thankfully, is currently being restored to the kingdom), and, apparently, it's happened with Mel Gibson, too. Frankly, I'm not too good at following the lives of famous people, but when I hear something like this, I try to look at it with God's eyes (and theirs). How can I judge another when I myself have also been guilty of unfaithfulness to the Lord? I can't say that I completely understand any of it, but I think we should look at what we might have done in the past before we even start to criticize others. In this, I completely agree with you, and if I were to grade this as a paper, I'd give it an A+++ (even though I'm not a teacher).